How to Introduce Sex Toys to your Relationship
You are in a long term relationship or longish relationship…the sex is hot and satisfying, so you might be thinking if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it…true, but truly do you just like one flavour of ice cream, do you really own just one pair of shoes or do you always go to the same place to eat? I suspect not, you like variety, you are loyal of course, but isn’t it nice to try something different every once in a while? Of course it is…Sex toys do not replace intimacy between you and your partner, they just enhance your sexual experience. Sex toys simply can do things your body just can’t. We just don’t vibrate! Playing with sex toys together is a valuable way to enjoy intimacy between the two of you and a great way to add a new element to your love making.
Keep it Positive
Talk about sex toys before you bring out the oh so large dildo you spontaneously picked up at lunch. You know your partner, you know how they react to change and something new…so really bringing a sex toy into the mix is no different. You could mention an interesting article you read online because for some just jumping into the conversation is not the way to go…some of us need a gentle nudge. Emphasize this is something new for you to try together. This is an adventure that you can have together. Make sure to assure your partner that this idea of a sex toy is not a negative. You are not commenting on something that is missing from your sexcapades. Keep it sexy outside of the bedroom, send a sexy text, remind them of a particularly hot experience you’ve recently had. Make the conversation about both of you, how much fun you’ll have together trying something new.
Choose your Sex Toy Together
Once you’ve broached the subject and your partner is receptive there are lots of ways to follow through. You could have a date night and shop together for a sex toy in a sex shop. If you or your partner feel too shy about that, try an online sex shop. Look for one that has lots of good information so you can choose the right sex toy for you. If your partner is male, he may think vibrators really offer nothing for him…and he would be wrong. Vibration feels good, so put that sex toy anywhere that feels sensitive to him. He will love it. Start out simple. You don’t need a lot of variation…just the fact that you are trying something new for the first time is stimulating enough. Think non-threatening, something small can also increase your closeness and intimacy.
Try Something New
Remember using a sex toy is totally normal. This industry is growing and growing and there is a ton of excellent choice. You are not alone to be curious about a sex toy. Emphasis positive experiences, be honest and understand that a sense of humour and giving yourself and your partner a break in terms of expertise is the best way to go. This is new, it might not be perfect the first time, that’s OK. You are trying something new and you are learning and you’re doing it together. And that is pretty darn awesome.
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